Welcome to weekend writing warriors. Many fine authors, and me, contribute short snippets for your delectation. This is the start of a new work, Illegal Aliens. It is something of a cross between a horror story, a science fiction tale, and a romance.
Roland, an archaeology instructor at Reading University (academic ranks in the UK are different than in the US, he’d be an assistant professor in the land of the free), is on his way to London. He’s on call when something unusual turns up in the works on the new underground. After an interesting conversation on the train, he arrives to find the odd item – a block of Roman Concrete which is covered in inscriptions.
Roland’s dinner continues, with an unusual choice of meal. He has just asked his visitor if she’s hungry. She has just sniffed him and told him he’s the one. Shades of the Matrix? Continuing from last week things are about to heat up.
The bartender put the bottle on the counter, “Roland, lad, Here’s the plonk.” Roland started to stand but the woman reached over and touched him; he shivered at the touch, as though a spark passed between them.
The bartender laughed, “I’ll bring it over; time you met another girl.”
In the background, his cook called out, “two burgers, one curry.”
After the food arrived, the woman looked at her plate, “This isn’t meat.”
“Take the bread off.”
She still stared in confusion, and then tentatively picked up the patty.
“That’s not how you eat it,” Roland reached over with his knife and fork, cut a piece, and offered it to her; she put her mouth over the piece and pulled it off; she swallowed, “Meat, it is meat.” Smiling at him, she picked up her fork, and her knife, and after some initial awkwardness, cut a piece of her burger, “For you.”
My sincere apologies for abusing semi-colons.
I found an Americanism that had crept in, Barkeep. I mean Bartender, actually Landlord or Publican.
While I’m on the subject of Americanisms, Yanks tend to hold their utensils upside down. Eating forks with 3 or 4 tines, as opposed to cooking tools, became established in Britain during the 18th century. Typically they were flat and used to stab/hold things. Curved forks were developed in Germany towards the end of the 18th century, but by then the stab/balance on the back of the fork pattern of British and European usage was established. It wasn’t until after the American revolution that the curved spoon-like forks we use today became popular. Hence Yanks tend to use forks like spoons. The most practical way to use the forks in the image above is to use them to hold down a piece of food while cutting it, and then to switch to a spoon to bring the morsel and sauce/dripping to your mouth. Mind you now we’ve moved on to those awful sporks.
The featured image shows the Royal Berkshire regiment playing in 2006 outside the Oracle in Reading. They were recruiting, and for the fun of it playing an arrangement of the Black Adder theme.
Haha, I love how she’s navigating the clearly strange burger.
Thank you.
While taking some issue with your description of we wield our forks over here, I enjoyed the snippet. This is such an intriguing story you’re spinning!
The UK part of my family definitely hold their forks upside down from us yanks. I’ve had to learn both ways. 😉 Thank you for reading.
Roland’s dinner partner hasn’t been in our world very long, has she? Fun excerpt!
Hamburgers are a relatively recent invention. Thank you.
Intriguing scene, Amelia. Sometimes I feel the same way about the meat I’m served at a restaurant!
Especially if it’s served in club sauce (obscure reference to arrested development here). Thank you.
Great snippet, very different from what I usually read. 😀
Thank you
I don’t see our professor picking up any of the warning signs. Looking forward to reading how this meeting unravels.
You’ve got me wondering what he thinks of this strange woman and her strange eating habits.
Next week. He’s “low hanging fruit” for romance right now. Thank you
My little nephew was eating his pizza from the top. Not the tip, not the crust, biting right into the pepperoni and cheese. 🙂 It’s amazing how we take the way we see things as the only way.
We eat banana’s upside down, you know. They peal much easier from the other end (away from the stem) as any chimpanzee will tell you. 😉 Thank you for reading.
Different customs. Always intriguing. Good snippet. Makes me wonder where she’s from. I notice he doesn’t seem to question that.